Lately it seems there is heartbreak and misery all around. Relatives and friends coping with life changing illnesses, deaths, cancer diagnoses, job loss, divorce, and the list goes on. The most recent horrific event, affecting someone very close to me, got me thinking about life with all its unpredictable twists and turns. And I’m counting my blessings today.
Being widowed, I’ve definitely been through plenty of heartache and misery myself. Now that I’m finally in a pretty good place, seeing others suffering and being devastated perhaps hurts me even more than it would have before. I’ve experienced the kind of heartache I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy. And it pains me to see anyone having to go through a difficult, sad time.
Feeling Guilty About Finally Being Pretty Happy Again
Feeling guilty about enjoying life post-loss has been something I’ve struggled with ever since I started having happy moments again. I wrote a blog post, Semi-Happiness and Guilt, on Widowed Village about this issue back in 2013. Now that I see several people who are dear to me suffering and struggling with serious issues, I find myself right back in that guilt. How can I be so happy right now when they’re going through the worst time of their lives?
This guilt is something I think many of us are dealing with as we slowly heal from our grief. We have to remind ourselves that, whether we like it or not, our lives go on and the special person we lost would want us to enjoy life again. After all, if it had been the other way around, we would have wanted them to be happy again too at some point, right?
Counting My Blessings
Seeing these heartaches and struggles all around me, I am reminded to be grateful for all the blessings in my life right now. And I am reminded to enjoy life as much as I can, for as long as I can—because it can all change in a heartbeat.