It’s only the end of October but I’m already dreading winter. We’re having a cold snap right now and it’s making me all too aware that the dark, gloomy days of wintertime are right around the corner.
Winter has always been a somewhat difficult time for me. I love being outside in the sunshine, I think it’s just something I need for my happiness. I love to garden or just putter around in the yard. Since I’ve been widowed, vegetable and flower gardening and just being in nature has become an increasingly important part of my life. It brings me joy. It soothes my soul.
Isolation and Loneliness Are Amplified in the Winter
So when winter rolls around, it’s really tough for me to be stuck inside most of the time. I think those cold, dark months are especially difficult for many widowed people, or really anyone who feels lonely or lost in some sort of way. Isolation and loneliness are amplified, and there’s too much time to sit around to think, mope and drown yourself in self-pity. Oh yeah, moping and self-pity have been relatively frequent visitors as of late anyway, sneaking their way back into my life. My recent breakup with my boyfriend didn’t help that matter. And I hate the thought of not being able to cuddle up to anyone on those cold evenings and nights. But it is what it is, and I’d rather be single than be with the wrong person. It still sucks though.
Cold Weather: Time for Cozy Candlelight and Heartwarming Foods
There are a few good things about winter, and I will try to focus on these to make it through the upcoming cold, dreary season. I love reading and snuggling up on the couch with a blanket and some hot tea. I enjoy the warm glow of lit candles when it gets dark so early. Cooking and baking and the aromas filling the house can be so comforting on a chilly day. It’s a great time for making soul-warming foods like hearty stews, chili, pot roasts, homemade bread and perhaps even some pie or cake here and there. And since I’ll be spending so much more time indoors, I’ll be able to catch up on some of my favorite TV shows. Dreary cold winter days are perfect for binge-watching.
Focusing on the Positive
So it’s not all bad but I know I will have to make a conscious effort to do and enjoy those things. I’ll have to focus on the positive and see the dreaded season as an opportunity rather than limitations. And being a homebody by nature, I’ll have to force myself to go places once in a while, just to get out, whether it’s the mall, a different town, or whatever. Selfcare is also something that I’ve been neglecting a bit and will do more of in the coming months, starting with a healthier diet and more exercise. I hope I’ll be able to follow through with all of that. I don’t want to get pulled into the darkness, I’ve been there and it took a long time to dig myself out of it.
Winter and all its gloominess tends to have me right on the edge of a precipice, ready to fall back into the dark pit of sadness and loneliness. And I really don’t want to go there again.